Eyes (Not final title): Preview

(*NOTE: it'll probably be a very very long time before i finish writing and editing this.)
It was a nice gloomy day. The girl was awakened by the relentless pitter pattering, and she was not happy about that. She opened her eyes to the grayness outside. The day had not even started yet, and she wanted it to be over. “A crappy day to suit my crappy mood,” she thought to herself. She rolled over in the wrong direction and landed on the ground with a thud, as if to prove her point. She mumbled a curse.

“Stella!” The voice made its way upstairs and into her closed bedroom. The girl hated her name. “Are you all right?”

Stella grumbled in response, then realized she couldn't be heard. “Yes, mother!” she screamed, while still laying on the ground.

“Well, get ready soon. We have a big day ahead of us!” The voice left her alone. Stella rolled around on the ground a couple more times, then forced herself up. She made it to the bathroom and went through the motions of getting ready. There was nothing stellar about her right now. Really. Not even after attacking her blue and black hair with a brush and putting makeup on. Maybe it had something to do with her hating the world.

She pulled something on from her closet, destroyed jeans and an old shirt, and trudged downstairs. She wanted it to be clear just how not excited she was for today.

“Jason, wake up.” Jason opened his eyes and looked at the person in front of him through his eyelids.

“Mom?” he asked half-asleep. Then the thought registered. He opened his eyes fully and sat up. “Mom! What are you doing here?”

“Waking you up.” She said this casually, as if she does it everyday. She doesn't. “I was going to have Lulu wake you up, but she thought it would be rude to do so.”

Jason glanced over at Lulu, who was standing just outside the doorway, and the maid looked down.

“Oh,” he said.

His mom waited for him to continue, and when that didn't happen, she straightened up and said, “Well, I'll have Nina make you breakfast, since you're up.” With that, she left and the mousy maid trailed behind her.

Jason didn't want to get up. He wanted to go back to sleep, where he can continue his dream about hot girls. Sleep didn't come. His mom had done a good job of waking him up. 

After Vince went to sleep at 1, he was woken up at 4, when John stumbled home. There had been loud, out of tune singing and then a string of curses after a crash. After the sounds stopped, he drifted back to sleep and woke up some time later.

He sat up from his makeshift bed on the ground. Seeing as his twin size bed took up ninety percent of his room, it was only logical that all of his possessions were dumped on it, and using the floor as a bed instead.

Vince reached under his bed and pulled out his clock. It had somehow rolled under there during the night. He still had two hours until he had to go to one of his jobs. He didn't know how to spend his two hours of free time. Vince could either do his homework or waste the time. He reached under his bed again, and this time pulled out some beer bottles. To his dismay, they were empty.

“Damn,” he said. “And I don't have any money.” He looked into the bottle for any last drop. If his parents were still around, he wouldn't be having this problem. He would be a rich kid without any bad habits. But his uncle wasn't exactly a good influence.

Vince rolled the bottles back under his bed, and took out his calculus. “What a nerd,” he thought. “Doing homework on a Saturday morning.” But he needed good grades to go to college and get out of this house. After attempting four problems, he had an hour left. Enough time for any encounters with John. As it was, John was passed out on the couch. Vince eyed the bottle in his hands and the ones scattered on the ground around him. It'll be a while before Vince's next paycheck.

Time to deliver pizza, then mop up some floors, and then help set up a high school reunion for snobby rich people. His parents went to that one high school, but they won't be there tonight. It would be kind of creepy if they did.

You Won't Understand: Calvin's Story

I woke up to World War III. If I counted it would probably be World War 100. It seemed that every morning my sister and Mom would argue about something stupid. I don’t understand women. Immediately, I got a headache. Why couldn’t they just shut up? I just came home from the hospital. They should be more considerate, but that would be asking too much wouldn’t it? Sometimes they are so annoying and I hate it. Maybe if I went down there, they would stop being loud, and so I did. I passed by a mirror and saw the bandage around my head. I look totally badass.

And I was right. As soon as I got down there they quieted down. I thought that maybe it will be peaceful, but then it got awkward. They were all staring at me. And by awkward, I mean really awkward. So then I awkwardly sat down in my chair. “Umm…” I didn’t know what to say. “Mom, can I have some breakfast?” For some reason, I was all polite. Mom probably thought I was being abnormal too.

“Oh Calvin, sure. I made eggs. I’ll go get them.” I wish someone would do something to this awkwardness. I can’t handle it anymore. I’ll probably have a mental breakdown or something and then have to go back to the hospital.

My sister probably felt the same way. “So…does your head hurt?” I wanted to tell her how stupid that question was. Obviously it hurt. I mean, I was in a car accident right?

“Yeah it hurts a lot, obviously.” I wondered if she would feel stupid now.

This seriously wasn’t helping with the awkwardness and my head started to seriously hurt again. I wanted to go back to sleep. I had an excuse, but then Mom showed up with my food. Finally.

Then there was another problem. I had lost my right arm and I’m a righty. I stared at my food, and then I stared at Mom. Mom and my sister stared back at me. “Aren’t you going to eat?” Why was my sister asking so many stupid questions today? Maybe I’ve just forgotten because I’ve been at the hospital for so long. Whatever.

I remember that before I tried practicing to become ambidextrous. I wish I tried harder. It would be useful now. I stared back down to my food. I hope my left arm would cooperate.

You Won't Understand: Iseul's Story

My name is Iseul Kim. I am writing this now so that nothing will be forgotten, especially not the horrors. So that after all this, people will look back and not make the same mistakes. Learn from them. History should not repeat itself.

At first, it seemed that life on Earth would be perfect. All the diseases were cured, every debt has been cleared, and wars were not fought. Life was indeed like the ones from science movies from the past. It seemed for a while that people as a whole had found a way to coexist with each other and the world.

But then, everything started failing, like things often do when you think it’s too good to be true. Diseases came back, mutated and stronger than ever. Chaos erupted as people did anything and everything they could to stay alive. Teams of scientists tried to create a cure, while others reverted back to praying to their gods. Nothing worked. It was as if the world was going to end.

With cities dying, the rich and elite up above with enough money began to find their own cures. The North Korean government was one of them. Their laboratories were horrific. They were secret and no one wanted to know what went on in there. But somehow, they found a cure. They gave it to desperate people, curing and reviving them, in exchange for work in the government.

The people were all grateful for this cure, and gladly went to work. And then regretted it. My father was one of those people. He brought the whole family with him. I wouldn’t blame him though; there was no way he would’ve known what he had done to us.

With help from the people, North Korea created a huge army and gradually began its conquest. One by one, the countries of Asia were swallowed and North Korea grew. Countries in the other continents could do nothing, but watch. The disease had left them in shambles and the government had no way to assemble a military. Soon, there was a new country. Asia.

By then, I was eighteen years old. Having grown up in North Korea, and considered a native and higher class, I was given extensive education. My intelligence saved my life, but also opened up doors to the worst things. I was given a job as a scientist in the army and forced to live in the government’s buildings. I was cut off from my family. I have no clue what happened to them.

Break the Glass: Chapter 7 (End)

The next day, I wake up and remember what is happening. This will be the last day I will wake up here, I think to myself.

Getting out of bed took too much effort and so I stay in my pajamas. Seriously, who will care? I can tell that Michelle felt the same way. I drag my suitcase downstairs and see Bitch and her family. My parents were talking and smiling with them. What?

“Hi Michelle!” She smiles sweetly. I immediately feel self conscious about what I was wearing. Why am I so lazy? “Mom, Dad, this is the friend I've been telling you about.”

Friend? “Hi Reya,” I mumble. I give a half smile towards her parents. It occurs to me that I don't know their last name. “Nice to see you.” Nice how the last person I am going to see is her.

They start talking again and I focus my attention on the glass, avoiding the Bitch. Michelle seems a lot happier than I was. Good for her.

“Michelle.” I look towards my mother. “Would you like to show Reya Bree dear around the house?”

I was about to protest when Reya says, “Oh, Miss Aurray, that's a wonderful idea. I really need to learn my way around my new home.”

New home?

Then she grabs my arm and drags me out, purposely digging her nails into my skin. I glance at our Bodies. Why do they look like they're having so much fun?

Once we're alone, I break free and massage my arm. It's numb.

“Are you surprised to find out that my family bought your house? Well, actually, we encouraged your parents to sell this house and move. We don't really want to live here, but that's ok.”

What's going on? I am so tired. All I want is to crawl back into bed. “No, not really,” I answer truthfully.

“That's disappointing. I wanted to give you a nice surprise.” She pouts.

“Wait. But why? Why are you here and-”

She cuts me off. “Because I wanted to, you know. I get my way a lot. Don't worry, I'll take care of Darren and make sure people don't miss you too much.”

“Oh, you do that.” I don't want to know what she's planning.

“Yeah. I always keep to my word.”

“That's good.” And it's actually true. My life is pretty miserable right now, isn't it?

Break the Glass: Chapter 6

In my dream, there are no such things as Reflections and Bodies. Or maybe I am the Body. Life is so much easier. I can go anywhere, say and do anything I want, without having to make sure that my Body was doing the same thing. It is so great. I am my own person. And a better person. I have courage and confidence. I can say the things in my mind.

I was admiring myself in the mirror. Then I look around, and I'm in the park. Darren's there too. I tell him, without saying anything, that I miss him. And that I want him back. We hug tightly and we twirl. There are flower petals and butterflies flying in the air. It is so beautiful. I never want that moment to end.

Then somehow, we're rolling in a grassy field. I end up under him. He stares lovingly into my eyes. I reach up to him and we kiss for a long time. We start taking off our clothes. I'm wearing a white dress and a white cardigan. Darren is wearing a black shirt and black jeans. We probably look like a yin yang, on top of each other and wearing black and white. Perfect balance and harmony. My cardigan is off and laying crumpled in the grass. I lifted up his shirt. And stop.

His entire body is a ruined mess. He stops moving, and his arms drop to his sides, limp, but I can't take my eyes away. Slowly, I stroke his scars, feeling every bump and very occasionally smooth skin. But everything I touch starts bleeding and melting away. I realize that too late.

He opens his mouth in a silent scream, and disintegrates into nothing. I stare at his empty clothes in my lap.

I start folding the clothes, casually, as if nothing happened.

At that point, I force myself to wake up. This nap did nothing, except to make everything worse. I need a therapist. Really.

Break the Glass: Chapter 5

Dear Diary,

So many things have happened since the last time that I don't even know where to start. It feels like nothing happened. I can't remember anything, or maybe I just blocked it out. That could be true.

I decide to make a list of why I love Darren, to see if all this is worth it. After ten minutes, I look at my list. There was nothing. Well, actually, there were some reasons, but I crossed them all out. They were all obsolete now.

I remember when we first met. I had been walking around the park and then was deep in thought next to the lake. “I wish I can have a reflection,” I had said out lout.

“Sometimes I wish that too.” I hadn't realized there was someone next to me, but I look up and see this beautiful boy. All I could focus on was his dark eyes and white scars.

Then we went on having a conversation about what it meant to be a Reflection. Our first meeting had been so serious, and I felt that he was different and special.

He understood me, but evidently, not anymore.

I once read on the internet that all girls want a bad boy who's only good for them. All guys want a good girl who's only bad for them. I don't think I'm exactly good or bad, but maybe Jolin's right. Maybe I only liked him because I wanted to be rebel. Date a badass or something like that. But I feel that isn't it. His “badness” had caught my attention, but it wasn't the only thing.

Scars fade, feelings fade, I tell myself. It's not a big deal if you can't find reasons to love him anymore. He doesn't. Why should you?

But I keep obsessing over it, because that's just what I do.

Maybe I'm not as independent from my Body as I think. Maybe she still loved him a little after the break up. Now she's moving on, taking me with her.

Then I remember how sad Darren was, how he wouldn't look at me, and how I wanted to cry. Bitch has kept to her word to make our lives miserable.

The phone rings and all my thoughts disperse. No one ever calls me. What is this? I set the empty list down and run to my bed where my phone is. I see the caller ID. It's Ashley.

“Hello?”

“Michelle!” Her voice is urgent. “Something really bad just happened!”

Break the Glass: Chapter 4

Dear Diary,

Last week was the longest week in my life. That doesn't mean that nothing happened though. There was A LOT of drama. Like, more than necessary. First, Darren's ex pushed her way into my life by becoming friends with Kathy. I usually don't see Kathy after school because she has dance practice, but now, I hardly see her in school. She doesn't even sit with me and Ashley at lunch. I wonder how Michelle feels about this stuff. She's probably going through the same shit as me.

What made me really happy though, is today. For some reason, Ashley's Body decided to take Michelle to a carnival/festival thing. It's as if they knew about the problems I've been having and that I deserve a break. So of course Ashley and I went along too. I'm not really sure what it was, but it was fun. I didn't see any bitches at all, and that was great.

The only awkward part was when our Bodies went in the House of Mirrors. That wasn't as fun. Imagine having to be in hundreds of places at once. I once read a book where people were “unwound”. People's body parts were separated, but their souls were still intact, so they could see and feel and be aware of everything. That's how I felt. Whoever invented this House thing better be burning in hell.

Ok. I admit, that was a bit harsh. But it was horrible.

It was even worse than those weird mirror things where us Reflections were stretched and messed up.

Break the Glass: Chapter 3 (Updated 4/9/2013)

(Why is my format all messed up?)

Dear Diary,

My life is so empty now. During the drama in the past few days, I've lost Darren. He was pretty much the most important person in my life! I feel like I lost my friends too. Talking to Kathy is awkward. I don't know why though. I'm not even mad at her. Ashley is still on her cruise. Will she be talking to me even if she was here? I don't know, but I hope so.

My life is so sad that I want school to start, even if it means sitting through boring lectures and hanging out in bathrooms all day.

The last few days of winter break were the worst. I didn't do anything, other than sitting in front of my laptop all day, everyday, wallowing in self pity. I became more and more nervous about school. What are people going to say? I'm not popular, pretty nerdy, in fact, but Darren is much higher in the social hierarchy. And now that we're over, what are they all going to say? The good thing is I only have two classes with Darren. Lunch and gym. I don't have to talk to him in those, but I was still scared. I can't help it!

For some reason, Michelle only needs me for lunch and gym, because of unnecessary mirrors and reflective surfaces. Someone got a new shiny water bottle for Christmas. I think that is pretty stupid. 
On the way there, a random guy called out to me. I guess he's Darren's friend. “So you ain't Darren's girl no more?"
I mumble something along the lines of, "Umm . . .yeah?" and awkwardly run towards the cafeteria. When Ashley finally shows up, I forget about the random thing that just happened and immediately blurt, “Oh my god! You are so tan!” It is the truth and also the first thing I noticed. Then I realize I have to apologize. “Oh, and sorry about last time.” Pretty much the same thing I said to Kathy.

“It's ok. I can't ever stay mad at you,” I let out a sigh of relief. I still have a friend. “Because there's always something important I have to tell you, like right now.” That's why I love Ashley.

“What?”

“Did you know there's a new girl?”

No. No I do not. “Umm, no. What new girl?”

“Eh . . . she's not really new anymore. She came before winter break, but I just saw her today.”

Interesting. “Oh. What does she look like?”

“Umm, she's blonde and-” She stops and half points behind me. “She's right there.”

I really want to turn my head, but Michelle doesn't, so of course I can't. “Tell Michelle to turn her head! I want to see!” Ashley finds it amusing. I think that is sadistic of her. Then, magically, Michelle turns around. I smile, but it's wiped straight off my face when I actually see the new girl. Is this the right time to use “curiosity killed the cat”?

“Why is she talking to Darren? That's so not allowed!”

Break the Glass: Chapter 2

Dear Diary,

Nothing much has changed since last time I wrote. My life is still pretty messed up, but now I'm really lonely too. It's winter break and Michelle decided that she (we) should stay home and rot. Ashley is on a cruise, because her Body's family has the time and money to do that. Kathy is practicing, as usual. Have I mentioned before that she's a dancer? Well, she is, and dancing requires a lot of mirror time. I haven't seen her in a long time. I don't think I remember what she looks like. Just kidding. So there's no one I can confide into except this diary.

I'm not sure if I'm avoiding Darren, or he's hiding from me. Maybe it's both. Or we just can't find each other.

I stop writing, because I realize just how much I miss him. So I get up and go to my favorite place: in front of the computer. Technically, it's a laptop. Other people would get their phone and text, but I don't like to. There's no reason. I'm just special.

I open up chat, and stare at the screen. I can't exactly write “Hi. Are you avoiding me? Just wondering, so I can get rid of one of the options.” Although, I wonder how he would respond to that.

Hi. How are you? That sounds too formal. I don't want to act like we're strangers.

Hey, watcha doin? How about no.

Hi. What are you doing? No.

So I settle on “Hey”. I'm not sure if he's even online, because he is almost always on invisible. Then I see on the bottom of the screen that he's typing. That's a good sign, I guess.

Darren: Hi. How's winter break?

That's such an awkward question.

Me: Lonely.

Without you.

Wow, I can't believe I just wrote that. He probably thinks I'm desperate. Can I just tell him that I miss him? Probably not.

Break the Glass: Chapter 1

I stare at the girl on the other side of the glass and copy what she was doing. The girl, Michelle, has a dreadfully boring bathroom routine. It is the same every day. In the morning, she would brush her teeth, use the toilet, put in her contacts and pretty herself up. At night, she would brush her teeth, use the toilet, take out her contacts, and wash off the makeup.

Sometimes, she would sing. She thinks that she’s a great singer, but I won't know better. The glass in soundproof. Michelle always seems to enjoy herself though. Occasionally, there would be a spider hiding in a corner, and I would go through the moves of freaking out. I don’t know why she’s so scared of them. Then, Michelle would finally finish everything and I would leave the glass, ready to jump in whenever.

It’s a tricky job, having to copy everything Michelle does, but I have to. I live in the Reflection World.

Long ago, the Bodies and Reflections lived side by side without the need of a barrier, friendly and cooperative. Both needed each other to live, but at one point in time, the Reflections felt the unjust. We looked the same, but had no free will of our own and were so commonly taken for granted. So there was the Revolt. The Bodies seemed to have forgotten, but we don’t have the chance. The story of humiliating defeat and becoming locked up behind the glass is the story passed down the generations.

Even though we were locked up and the Bodies forgot we’re alive, we still have a connection with each other.

I think about saying goodbye to my parents, but Michelle runs out of the house. We reach the bus just in time. I get on and settle in. It'll be a while before Darren's stop. One good thing about being a Reflection is that I don't have to do anything to make friends. Or boyfriends. The Reflection of my Body's boyfriend is automatically mine. I look outside the window and make up stories about the people we pass. That girl screaming at her phone is arguing with her boyfriend. They're going to break up tonight. That kitten over there is actually the leader of a cat gang and is plotting how to overthrow humans.